Posts tagged jesus

Jesus is a CockBlock.

10 months ago

by Andrew J Rivers in Uncategorized

So I was in Richland, Wa the last few nights doing a great comedy show at Jokers Casino. It was three nights. After the comedy show it turns into a nightclub and all sorts of girls come in and everyone dances. Exciting. After the first show, these girls come up to me and start talking [...]

Jesus Loves Me

1 year ago

by Andrew J Rivers in Uncategorized

If you’ve ever seen my act (on 99% of days) I don’t swear. I push the limits, and some words might make your grandparents blush still. (Although I’m told old people like me.) But I’m sure most of what I say could be said on Television. (except for COCK – although I don’t use that [...]

4 balls abortion baby killer comedy gay gay marraige ground zero gun control homo jesus legalize it mom mosque Seattle three strikes

Introduction

After 300 shows in each of his first two years as a comedian. Andrew Rivers quickly became one of the northwest’s breakout stars and hit the road, gaining 40,000 literal miles of experience on his car during just his third year as a comedian.

Currently, Andrew is touring across the country talking about his life experiences in a fun way, that’s relatable to almost any age audience. When he happens to be in the Seattle area, he is regularly featured on Clear Channel Radio. You can see a calendar with a list of upcoming shows here.

His career highlights include working with Richard Lewis several times, working with the Cast of "Whose Live Anyway" and running a comedy show in a Hooters Casino for 6 months. Andrew’s first CD: “Future Sex/Love Jokes” is available now on itunes. Please purchase a copy before Justin Timberlake sues him. Andrew needs the money to hire a real web guy, so he can stop talking in the third person.
Testimonials

What others say about Andrew:
"You have a great energy and a powerful stage presence. Those are traits you cannot buy. You either have them or you don't. You will only get better and better with stage time."
-Eddie Brill
Comedian, Booker - "Tonight Show with David Letterman."

"(You're) very natural and funny. Just keep up the work, be yourself and with a few breaks you'll have a blast"
-Richard Lewis
Comedian, Actor -"Curb Your Enthusiasm."

"It is a pleasure watching your improvement each time you hit the stage."
-Boone Helm
Marketing Director, Parlor Live Comedy Club. Bellevue, Wa.

"Very very few comics have had your energy and drive at this. (It) is incredibly impressive. You will be a success at comedy. You will do great things."
-Kermet Apio
Comedian, Winner of the 'Seattle Comedy Competition', Winner of the 'Great American Comedy Festival' and All Around Nice Guy.

"In my lifetime. Many people have come up to me and said 'I'm going to be a comedian.' IN MY LIFE. Only 3 people have ever come back and met me again and been a paid, booked comedian. You're number 3. That's impressive."
-Christopher Titus
Comedian, Actor - "Titus"

"Give Up!"
-Gilbert Gottfried
Comedian, Actor and Voice of Aflac Duck.

Go to Top

Posts tagged jesus

Jesus is a CockBlock.

Jesus Loves Me

Introduction

Testimonials